如果让莎士比亚、海明威编写JavaScript代码

function fibonacci (size) {
  var first = 0, second = 1, next, count = 2, result = [first, second];
  if(size < 2)
    return "the request was made but it was not good" while(count++ < size) {
    next = first + second;
    first = second;
    second = next;
    result.push (next);
  }
  return result;
}

function theSeriesOfFIBONACCI (theSize) {
  
//a CALCKULATION in two acts. //employ'ng the humourous logick of JAVA-SCRIPTE //Dramatis Personae var theResult;
//an ARRAY to contain THE NUMBERS var theCounter;
//a NUMBER, serv'nt to the FOR LOOP //ACT I: in which a ZERO is added for INITIATION //[ENTER: theResult] //Upon the noble list bestow a zero var theResult = [0];
  
//ACT II: a LOOP in which the final TWO NUMBERS are QUEREED and SUMM'D //[ENTER: theCounter] //Commence at one and venture o'er the numbers for (theCounter = 1; theCounter < theSize; theCounter++) {
    
//By divination set adjoining members theResult[theCounter] = (theResult[theCounter-1]||1) + theResult[Math.max (0, theCounter-2)];
  }
  
//'Tis done, and here's the answer. return theResult;
  
//[Exuent] }

function Colette (umbrella) {
  var staircase = 0, galleons = 0, brigantines = 1, armada = [galleons, brigantines], bassoon;
  Array.prototype.embrace = [].push;
  while(2 + staircase++ < umbrella) {
    bassoon = galleons + brigantines;
    armada.embrace (brigantines = (galleons = brigantines, bassoon));
  }
  return armada;
}

function LeonardoPisanoBigollo (l) {
  if(l < 0) {
    return "I'd prefer not to respond. (Although several replies occur to me)"
  }
  
/**/ //Everything is getting complicated. for (var i=2,r=[0,1].slice (0,l);i<l;r.push (r[i-1]+r[i-2]),i++)
  
/**/ //Here are some other mathematicians. Mostly it's just nonsense. rationalTheorists = ["Archimedes of Syracuse", "Pierre de Fermat (such margins, boys!)", "Srinivasa Ramanujan", "Rene Descartes", "Leonhard Euler", "Carl Gauss", "Johann Bernoulli", "Jacob Bernoulli", "Aryabhata", "Brahmagupta", "Bhaskara II", "Nilakantha Somayaji", "Omar Khayyám", "Muhammad ibn Mūsā al-Khwārizmī", "Bernhard Riemann", "Gottfried Leibniz", "Andrey Kolmogorov", "Euclid of Alexandria", "Jules Henri Poincaré", "Srinivasa Ramanujan", "Alexander Grothendieck (who could forget?)", "David Hilbert", "Alan Turing", "von Neumann", "Kurt Gödel", "Joseph-Louis Lagrange", "Georg Cantor", "William Rowan Hamilton", "Carl Jacobi", "Évariste Galois", "Nikolay Lobachevsky", "Rene Descartes", "Joseph Fourier", "Pierre-Simon Laplace", "Alonzo Church", "Nikolay Bogolyubov"]
  
/**/ //I didn't understand any of this, but here it is anyway. return r
  
/**/ //Nothing happens here and if it does I'd rather not talk about it. }

function mrFibbowicksNumbers (enormity) {
  var assortment = [0,1,1], tally = 3, artfulRatio = 1.61803;
 
  while(tally++ < enormity) {
    
//here is an exceedingly clever device assortment.push (Math.round (assortment[tally-2] * artfulRatio));
  }
  
//should there be an overabundance of elements, a remedy need be applied return assortment.slice (0, enormity);
}

/*...the only numbers for me are the mad ones, take forty-three like a
steam engine with a talky caboose at the end*/
n = 43,
/*and that lanky
fellow in a cocked fedora*/
r = 1 /*then back to our number, our mad
number, mad to become one*/ while (n > 1)
/*mad to descend*/
n--,
/*mad
to multiply*/
r = r * n
/*and at the end, you see the blue center-light
pop, and everybody goes 1.4050061177528801e+51...*/
r

# In which various NUMBERS are summon'd by
# means of ELECTRONICK CONJURY
factorial = (n) ->
   # All argument is against it; yet all belief is for it
   return 1 unless n
   # Ingenious sophistry to prove the palp'bly OBVIOUS
   return 1 if n is 1
   # Recursion (n.)
   # a program that calls 'pon itself in the manner of
   # a dog returning unto its VOMIT
   return n * factorial n - 1

function hacktorial (integette) {
  var nonthings = [undefined, null, false, 0, '', NaN];
  var resultution = 1;
 
  if (integette == 0) {
    
//behold the strangerous zeroine! resultution = 1;
  } else {
    while (integette > 1)
    
//caligulate by multicapables resultution = resultution * integette--;
  }
  with(resultution) {
    var duodismal = Function ('return this') .call (toString (12));
    var disemvowel = Function ("n","return n?parseInt (n,12):'0'")
    return [
      disemvowel (duodismal.slice (0,-1)),
      'shillings and',
      disemvowel (duodismal[duodismal.length-1]), 'pence'
    ].join (' ');
  }
  
//klikkaklakkaklaskaklopatzklatschabattacreppycrottygraddahappluddyappladdypkonpkot! }

hacktorial (3)
//"0 shillings and 6 pence" hacktorial (4)
//"2 shillings and 0 pence" hacktorial (7)
//"420 shillings and 0 pence" hacktorial (21)
//"4257578514309120000 shillings and 0 pence"

//using Ramanujan's approximation function fractorail (n){
  with(Math) {
    var r = sqrt (PI)*pow (n/E,n); r *= pow (8*pow (n, 3) + 4*(n*n) + n + 1/30, 1/6);
    return r;
  }
}

fractorail (3);
//6.00005 fractorail (1.1);
//1.04671 fractorail (5.2);
//169.40628

"use strict";
//In solving a problem of this sort, the grand thing is to be able to reason backwards...
//some things are easier known than explained! var caseHistory = new Object ({2:2, 6:3});
function unfactorial (evidence){
    
//first, humility! if (evidence === 1) {
      return "Watson, I am at a loss!"
    }
    
//second, logical precedence! if(caseHistory[evidence]){
      
//elementary! return caseHistory[evidence];
    }
    
//third, eliminate the impossible! if(evidence === 0 || evidence % 24 !== 0) {
      return "charlatans!";
    }
    
//fourth, deduction! var theDeduction, enumarator = evidence, denominator = 1;
    while(enumarator % denominator === 0) {
      enumarator = enumarator/denominator++; if (enumarator === denominator) {
        theDeduction = enumarator;
      }
    }
    theDeduction = theDeduction || "impostors";
    
//What one man can invent another can discover! caseHistory[evidence] = theDeduction;
    
//What remains, however improbable, must be the truth! return theDeduction;
}

factorial = (function() {
  
//I declare... var ledger = {};
  return function reckoning (quantity) {
    if (isNaN (quantity)) {
      console.log ("I have not the pleasure of understanding you");
      return;
    }
    
//It is a truth universally acknowledged that two values //can only be adjudged truly agreeable by means of === if (quantity === 0) {
      return 1;
    }
    
//Mr Crockford teaches that we be wary of inherited property... if (ledger.hasOwnProperty (quantity)) {
      return ledger[quantity];
    }
    
//Pray persist until an answer is furnished return ledger[quantity] = quantity * reckoning (quantity - 1);
  };
})();

//Economy. function factorial (n) {
  return n < 2 ? 1: factorial (n-1)*n;
}

最优秀的英语作家具有着对规则的蔑视。——Steven Pinker